i will call you back.

i’m sorry i shut you out

sometimes i shut people out.

and i often shut out the ones that matter most..

i ghosted my therapist last week..
straight up missed our morning session..
ignored her phone calls..
didn't return her voicemail..
didn't listen to her voicemail, honestly..
just put my phone away for now..
out of sight, out of mind..
right?

WRONG.

at my next therapy session,
the place, person and whatever else i was avoiding,
well, they didn't go away.
because right now,
i'm sitting in the same room,
looking at the same therapist,
at the same time,
on the same day of the week,
it's 8:00 A.M.
it's tuesday.

if i ever hurt you by not letting you in,

i want to say “i’m truly sorry”.

also,

you deserves the truth.

so,

i’ve been avoiding you because,

“i’ll have to explain myself to you.“

boo, freakin’ hoo..

oh, and

i feel foolish.
i feel embarrassed.
i truly have no excuse.
you did nothing wrong.
mostly, you cared.
i just can't do it right now.
i'll call you back next week.

i never call you back.

please don’t be upset,

it’s not your fault,

i’m working on it,

i pinky promise,

soon,

i’m will call you back.